neviiven’s posterous

ok people, give me a break!

facebook this and facebook that, new TOS, the consumer world got hysterical.

when are we finally going to understand that the old rules of service offering are actually really old and do not apply to the new economy? it's like playing in the dirt and noticing at some point that our clothes are all scruffy. we are all mature Internet users (I presume) and the nature of Internet is like keeping all traces of every action, and any behavior at zero cost (dramatic punchline).

I'm not saying that facebook is cool because it (they) want to keep and use, copy and play with our data but we aren't either.
I know some of us are still hiding in a backyard or an old cinema and eat cookies or watch porns or cuddle old slippers and pretend to be salvador dali but the Internet isn't this safe dark room.

on the contrary - every step we take online, is on. every innocent email, the pictures of the last conference, our work projects, our contacts - all this is visible, retrievable and existent.

it's called a web because it's connected and because once you've put your content online, there's no un-webbing anymore. you belong to the web.

you can have the cake and eat it too but don't say after that that you weren't aware of the fact that it has sugar in it.

be aware of what you are online, be yourself and don't be afraid ;)))

 (oops, I started writing Internet with an "I", oh God!)

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love it all
These games we play
I close my eyes
You run away
I'm sure I asked you to stay
But now you're gone
And so I feel the grey
Pulse in my head
I turn off the lights and crawl into bed
I try to think of sunshine
But my body goes wet
With the first crash of thunder

I don't think I can know
Anyone but you dear
That's for sure

When it gets to four
It's my turn to go
Oh the kiss
So alcoholic and slow
Arranging me for saturday
I thought you would know
That I always sleep
Alone

I don't think I can know
Anyone but you
Dear
That's for sure

The upstairs room is cool and bright
We can go up there in summer
And dance all night

Your sister started talking at a minute after ten
So everyone jumped up
And then fell over again
In april you can join them
And stare at me
At the ghost from your past

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so many things in life are not what they seem at first sight.
and a great percentage of them are not what they seem after a second observation.

recognizing some patterns and signs is so hard sometimes. I don't mean some semi-magical appearances but the most normal and simple things which happen in one's life. behind the everyday occurences there is always a deeper meaning. that's why we often say that we have a lucky phase, a successful one or on the contrary - that we have bad karma and nothing feels right in place.

understanding these phases and their symptoms can help us control at least some of our choices and channel our activities in the right direction.

for me the most confusing part is when some very auspicious things come into my life. these are things I almost provoked happen consciously when imagining how great it would be to have them in my life. there are not exact replicas of my dreams but are very close to the original wants. this of course is a source of joy.

after a while (first&second observation pass) these things start revealing other specifics of their true nature which are not very compatible with my hopes and expectations. or their actions start appearing totally undecipherable. and then comes the hard confusing part - is it me that is not ready for the things I want or are those things not the right for me? shall I change something and if so what?

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If milk is white then doubt is an octopus.

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dear girls and boys, we are different.
ok, we are all human (more or less). but there are different rules that we apply in our game.

if a relationship is like a friday night at the casino our beloved boyfriend is the game itself, he is every single step, eihter success or loss. what matters is black, red and a number. every turn of the roulette is like a new function. the energy is focussed, there is no dispersion. there is no overall emotion, no perception of the whole. every result counts and doesn't build the sum of something.

 in this metaphor the girls are the night at the casino itself. the whole experience. it's influenced by the casino people, by the clothes, the lights, the scents, by the fact that someone is screaming, someone is losing, that there's a fight.

the same principle applies to the problem scenario. let's picture a boy and girl and a problem they have. the boy may have let's say a yellow problem. if he turns around then he won't see the yellow problem anymore, he will see e.g. red. for the girl a problem doesn't have a color, the problem is a sound, it doesn't matter which direction she will turn to, she still will be listening to the sound. when there's something that bothers a girl it's in everything she does.

for some reason we have to figure out how to deal with each other. so maybe the best way is to accept and try to understand the differences and communicate more candidly.

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If by Rudyard Kipling - do you feel it in your stomach?

If
 
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
 
If you can dream — and not make dreams your master;
If you can think — and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools;
 
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
 
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings — nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run –
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And — which is more — you'll be a Man, my son!

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I wanna go over it, over and over again
again until I am out of breath
out of my mind I am letting myself do it again
again until I cannot move anymore

because it took it all
because it took it all
now. I fall

I feel it climbing the fence of my garden
see it - streching and screaming again
And I wanna be over, to do it again
until I am no more and sometimes elsewhere

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this is just a test. sorry for the inconvenience.

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you stay home and play online: )

thanks to twitter and @bluelectric I found this website - www.photofunia.com

have fun!

(although I hope that on a saturday night you're out: ))

p.s. my graffiti

pps lily allen's new songs are awesome

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I really cannot manage  this skyscraper big piece of cake I buoght myself after I had a huge pizza slice so I'm writing my first note on posterous via the non-USP-point of entry, the website itself. I will give gmail a try later. 

so, I'm sure it will be funerous here.

stay awake, behave and don't buy cakes with a skyscraper size. 

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